Thursday, November 22, 2007

Quit Smoking

I quit smoking yesterday which I think is good for many reasons, including today (the day after, making one complete day in a few hours) my daughters first birthday. It's also Thanksgiving. Hypocritical thanks giving. Some of my people were slaughtered by these Americans and they give "thanks" lol. My other people may have been slaves. No, I'm not black... Too many black people suck up all the credit for slavery. You know what, I'm white and my ancestors were slaves too! SUCK ON THAT! Am I going to ask you to make me some corn bread to pay reprimands? NO, I'LL MAKE MY OWN CORN BREAD THANKS ECONOMY LEECH. You can have some though, I don't mind sharing, but not because I feel like I OWE it to you.

Well, now because I've quit smoking, all things I do - at least for the next 3 months are completely excusable, understandable, and completely necessary. At least, that's how people act when they quit smoking - they're excuse is "I QUIT SMOKING I'M UNDER STRESS, I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M ANGRY." Those are weak people. Those are people who's real problem is they're still in their baby stage where they think their anger, screaming and temper tantrum is going to get them what they want without saying anything to anyone. If that's not the truth, than WHAT PURPOSE DOES IT SERVE TO YELL AT SOMEONE BESIDES GETTING THE POINT ACROSS, well, it serves the purpose of making the yeller miserable by wasting energy. Don't quit smoking and replace one self destructive habit with another - constant anger. If you can't control your happiness and only smoking can, then don't quit smoking. Depression will kill you a lot faster and you'll be less happy while you're croaking.

On the topic of giving substances credit for our actions overly: I think that's why MOST Americans who drink like drinking so much. Your subconscious: "Whatever I do, I can blame it on the beer. I'm more free this way. I can have 'fun.'" Americans and I'm sure people in other countries as well find things much more forgivable if someone is drunk. "OMG, I ran down the street naked?!" - "Yeah, man! You were so drunk!" or "I can't believe you said that to me last night" - "Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry! I was drunk... You know I get stupid when I drink..." - "Yeah but... Don't drink so much ok?" - "Ok, I love you" - "I love you too"

If you ever want to say anything to anyone and you're not sure how it's going to go. Get a little wasted then pretend to be really drunk and tell that person what you want them to hear, odds are if it doesn't go your way, you can rest assured you can do a little premeditated begging and pleading with the pressure being taken off you and diverted towards the alcohol. "I'm so sorry I didn't even realize I was doing that, why would I say that I don't want that, I hate beer, I'll never drink beer again!" Eventually, you'll be forgiven if you start drinking again too. "I'm not going to drink like I did before"

I've said all of this to inspire change, not so you'll actually do what I'm telling you to do here. If you do want to do what I've told you to do here, seek help outside of the bottle. Or wait, you can't because not only does the bottle give you an excuse for the things you do while you're drunk, it gives you an excuse for the things you do while you're not, so "I can't quit drinking or talk about it, how will I continue to get my feelings and expressions out in life?" Well, you'll continue getting your expressions out, you'll just remember it better. If you think your life is so worthless it's not worth remembering. Go donate your life to a monastery. There's plenty to choose from - Catholic, Christian, Buddhist, and more. What's best, is while you're there, you'll learn or re-learn what's really important in life, and you'll see how much better you are than you thought you were, I GUARANTEE THAT.

No, seriously, have a bloody fantastic day.

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